Saturday, April 05, 2014
My first "official" boyfriend, J.Z. (Those are his initials. Not Jay-Z, just to be clear) happened in 3rd or 4th grade. I believe we had been in the same class since Kindergarten, so the relationship was inevitable. He was also my BFF's boyfriend--he liked both of us, we both liked him, why make things messy? I believe she and I worked out a timeshare agreement ahead of time where we would, on alternating days, ignore him on the playground and blush furiously at the mention of his name. Also, once he gave us a broken Breyer horse statue to share. It was like a dream.
My first kiss with him was decided by coin toss--well, really by pencil flip, wherein if the pencil landed this way, it would be cheek; the other direction, mouth (spoiler alert: it landed on mouth). A second flip determined open or closed. Eyes. Open or closed eyes! Don't be gross. I don't remember what happened to the relationship after this pinnacle, but clearly it did not endure.
After that, grade school featured the guy I totally crushed on who liked me, too--but that all came to an end when I beat him in a race on the playground. I wasn't about to dumb it down. Then came the cute neighbor boy who was my true love until he broke up with me because I wouldn't walk in the park with my arm around him. What he took as a lack of devotion was really just an arm cramp.
Then came high school (after those awkward middle school years; not going to talk about those), the hormones and higher stakes. My first actual, real boyfriend happened. We were a real couple and went on dates and everything. He was a great kisser and we shared a love of music. This really was the tone of all my teenage affairs--kissing, music, not much talking, lots of unrequited feelings. Aah, the 80s.
I couldn't help but think back on my high school years watching teenage relationships portrayed in the media. From Andie & Blaine* to Dawson & Joey** to Rory & Dean***, these teen relationships did not represent my reality. I was more Angela Chase & Jordan Catalano**** or Julie & Randy*****--all angsty and clumsy.
So as I'm freaking out over my kid & his love life & talk to my friends about their experiences and seek out reality-based input, I found out that in real life? There's way more of the clumsy, angsty, not talking kind of relationship. I mean seriously, the first guy I was actually myself around asked me to marry him. What 12 year old American child is ready for that kind of pressure?
I have no regrets.
Name that teen couple! Did you recognize the names dropped in this post? If not, I assign you some remedial watching. To wit:
* Pretty in Pink
** Dawson's Creek
*** Gilmore Girls
**** My So-Called Life
***** Valley Girl
Bonus playlist: songs about love & such.
Wednesday, April 02, 2014
Well I was drunk! The day my mama! Got out of prison!This will make us all laugh at their silliness and the general inappropriateness of their behavior while it causes me to question my parenting skills (or lack thereof).
Monday, March 24, 2014
|At the park, 2005|
In Oklahoma, parks mean windy days, sometimes intense heat. It's hard to know what to expect, weather-wise.
When my kids were little, I would go to the park with a group of other moms and kids. We would travel in packs like a pride of lions--proud females with our offspring, a caravan of suburban nomads packed heavily with our sippy cups, diapers, wipes, bug spray, sunscreen, band-aids, graham crackers and grapes--always cut in half.
Wednesday, March 19, 2014
Monday, March 17, 2014
|Kale and White Bean soup.|
Next stop? Freezer.
A bowl of this soup, which I had prepared previously on a completely different dark and stormy day, and then frozen in individual portions for later use.
And here is where my story begins.