Monday, June 22, 2015

Summer Brain Drain

It's come early this year. Well, for me at least. I've just sat here and drafted two posts that were really strong ideas but just kind of fell apart over the course of an hour when I told my kids "please leave mommy alone for an hour so that mommy may be productive" (not in those words, exactly; mine may have been way more shouty and slightly impolite. With a few swears. You know, for emphasis.)


But looking at those posts, they never quite came together. Okay, fine, they sucked. I had good titles, and a strong idea but when you are trying to write a post and then...

... your son walks through the room singing and begins a conversation with you even though you are clearly immersed in something ... the dog starts barking at the daughter who starts, well, pretty much barking back at the dog... you get a text message and instead of the one you're waiting on it's from a restaurant even though you've unenrolled from their texting app like five times already, you have to do it again... and then your son is screaming bloody murder at the dog who is running around the backyard with what appears to be a sponge halfway down her throat... your daughter comes into the room holding some toy you thought was sold in last year's yard sale and she starts talking about wanting to sell her "collectibles" so she can buy accessories for said toy... and then your son wanders into the room after clearly just having showered though you told him that as soon as he made his bed he could go outside and play with squirt guns before the heat index reaches a zillion and four ("Oh. I thought you told me to take a shower.")... and then the buzzer rings for the washing machine so you have to go and change the load but you find a load of not quite dry towels in the dryer that's been there since—judging by the smell—a week ago and now you have another load to do and the dryer smells like ass because of the towels and then when you finish swearing about that and go to sit back down at your computer the dog appears to have taken off with an ass towel and is happily shredding it in the living room and when you try to take it she runs through the house like there was a firecracker lit under her butt and then the screams start from the front yard and this one is mad at that one and they squirted the other one from down the street and he's in trouble because his dad said "no playing in the water!" and—seriously? Why is your towel soaked already?—you see that there will be at least one more load of ass towels to add to the laundry list (literally) and damn, you've got to pee so you take time for that and get distracted by the pile of random crap you meant to go through earlier this morning when you first woke up but decided to get coffee and then forgot about the pile and doesn't coffee sound good right now? So you go to the kitchen to find your cup and you trip over the pile of wet clothes and hey kids, why are you in the house already? and it's been an hour since they went outside and now they want lunch but you haven't gone grocery shopping so there are those red bean Triscuits you bought on accident and a sketchy tub of cream cheese and can we go to McDonalds?

At some point, I'm told this will get better.

So how's your Monday been?

4 comments:

  1. Probably why I gravitate to photography now. All I have time to do in one sitting is edit a photo! Ha.

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  2. LOL because, you know, emphasis. haha, great post, thanks for the fun brain dump! xoxo Roll with it baby.

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  3. I LOVE reading your posts!

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  4. LOL don't you just love manic mondays? I've had so many of those. Fun time

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