I'm happy, excited, proud like a new mama, a little buzzed from the sugar in the cookies that I made.
Nervous doesn't begin to touch it—I'm nervousexcitedanxioushappy. I'm thankful my husband knows—he did his stint as a cast member last year, he remembers what rehearsals are like. He's going through my checklist in his head, too, "Don't forget"ing me and "Remember to"ing me and then getting the hell out of my way. He knows I turn into a rather strange blend of focused and forgetty when I get nervousexcitedanxioushappy.
I can't wait for these people to get in a room together. To share with one another. To pluck at these strings of magical connection I see in the air between us.
Ooh, we're doing a thing. And it's ever so exciting. It's got me feeling like a superhero or something. I could totally be a PowerPuff Girl, right?
I'm not sure what my name would be, but my character would look like this... complete with ripped jeans, a hoodie, bifocals and a notebook to capture all the thoughts while my cohorts capture all the bad guys.
Yesterday I took my son to do a thing—he competed in the National Geographic Geography Bee—and on the way there he was visibly nervous. Shakingly, babblingly anxious.
I did what I know how to do, I encouraged him and found the perfect song.
His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy ...I mean, laughter is a good distraction and what's funnier than your middle-aged mom sitting in the car seat next to you rapping?
He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready...And by the chorus, he was singing along.
... lose yourself in the moment, you own it, you better never let it go ...And he did it. He didn't win it, but he did it. He didn't back down. But he answered the obscure question about Iranian rappers and their songs of protest correct and during the final, we sat in the back of the auditorium cheering for the kids who did make it, whispering the answers back and forth to one another.
Today, like his dad and my daughter, he's cheering me on (or at least he will be once he drags his teenage keester out of bed). Becuase we're doing a thing. And it's going to be so cool!